Beauty and the Beast

Hilariously Woke and Unwatchable

Let's start with the first five minutes, where the film proves that the woke crowd does not have an objective definition of the words "handsome/beautiful" or "plain". They use historical makeup, which is a nice touch, I guess, but the fairy queen or whatever actually looks worse in her true form. Meanwhile the Mary Sue, Belle, is "plain" as an informed attribute. Her actress is also a "feminist" as an informed attribute, despite playing a role that is literally abused by a raging beast. Oh yes, and one more quoted term. She tells us this is a "provincial" (meaning small and backwater) town, yet somehow it contains a very multiracial demographic. Mmmm, right. Let's redefine terms for fun.