Kurt Hansen's Reviews
Results of "science fiction movies I might have missed"
I came across No Blade of Grass by searching for science fiction movies I might have missed and this is one hell of a miss. On one hand, the story is well enough to keep you engaged, minus the occasional psychedelic turn, gang of English Easy Riders and absolutely rotten theme song. On the other, it's kind of lazy and dated: montage of pollution stock video and of dead animals, mediocre acting and the plot inevitably winds down to kind of a crawl.
And No Blade of Grass is "Anti-Woke" in its portrayal of subservient women and all powerful, all knowing men in the film. They go hog-wild on that and it gets a little cringe after a while.
What did I miss? It's not a classic, but it'll do. I'm happy I stuck around past the opening theme song.
Created: 12-31-2025
Slasher chases modern teens into a gay bar
Please stop. Every God damn film. We have a typical slasher-type film which kind of has been rehashed since the dawn of time, but a bit of predictability is far better than when they jammed a homosexual love affair into the middle of the film, out of left field.
Clown in a Cornfield isn't funny, but it's got cringe down. A sheriff who does whatever the hell he wants to do, adult townies that clearly hate these modern, agenda driven teenagers and their new fangled ideas and, naturally, a gay love affair between the pretty boy and redneck. By the end of the film, it's devolved into a blathering rant of woke ideology from the "old generation" about Mother Earth and cat videos.
I feel the need to stop watching films from the 70's and 80's to get a modern woke-r-not perspective, but there's so much of this shit, it makes my head ache.
It was a laugh when the kids try to use a rotary phone. That was silly!
Created: 12-30-2025
Kind of fun, bloody, indie horror
The acting actually isn't as terrible as I'd expected and at least The Demon Inside isn't made on a cell phone. The sound quality and lighting isn't amateur and the plot is serviceable. That's really cool. I wish more indie films were made with higher quality equipment and better caliber actors like this one. I even bumped my rating a little higher just for that. Don't expect a lot, but it's worth a watch.
I was surprised to learn that I think these indie films are mostly woke free because they don't have to bow to their corporate overlords for funding and have less need to appeal to everyone and anyone.
... Minor spoilers ...
It's mainly about a dude with a drinking problem who's house is possessed by a demon. He and his wife call upon a group of nutty ghost hunters to try and relieve the home of demons, but that doesn't work. There's a fair amount of blood, no apparent CGI and it's free of any and all woke aspects.
Created: 12-29-2025
Mostly for Markiplier, Dawko and FNAF fans only
It's not a terrible movie and there's zero woke aspects to the film, but the viewer has to be a FNAF fan to truly understand the movie. I know because my wife absolutely loves Five Nights at Freddy's. There's characters in this film that you just won't know or understand if you haven't played the games.
As a casual FNAF player who really hasn't played the 2nd game or others in the franchise, I was quite lost in this PG-13 film. There's not much violence or plot to keep a part-time player interested. However, if you're a fan, this movie is the bomb! Seems like they get the canon right and the characters are spot-on. I'd highly recommend this movie for fans of the game.
Created: 12-24-2025
A tense, dark, somewhat forgotten classic
Kind of a deviation for Roy Scheider of Jaws, Sorcerer is a relatively straightforward kind-of action movie about four fugitives on one crazy mission to deliver unstable dynamite to an exploded oil rig. There's a bit of drama thrown in and the film is tense from beginning to end.
I think everyone agrees that the cinematography, filming and acting is well above anything we see today. One review says the film just couldn't work today since the famous bridge scene would have to be CGI and I agree. The story is a bit disjoined in the beginning, but it all comes together quickly enough.
If you're looking for a break from these modern woke times, put on Sorcerer and enjoy.
Created: 12-23-2025
Magicians with CGI
Since this review is getting hammered for not accounting for Ariana Greenblatt's unrealistic girl ass-kicking, I took another look and have to say maybe I've been too forgiving on the girl action stuff. Plus, Ariana has a one hell of a resume full of ultra-woke films. I'm looking at you, Barbie and Borderlands. So I take it back.
I missed the first two films, likely because I don't dig magic. Like, a magician will use anything they can to trick their audience, including CGI. Just like in this film! Fortunately, my somewhat dislike for magic didn't keep me from watching this. I didn't know anything about the gang, what they did or even that they were actually magicians. Can't say I even heard of the first films in this franchise. Strange.
Now You See Me: Now You Don't is kind of a fun movie and I liked the crazy overarching trickery plot that went on. Woody Harrelson is cool, but I kind of felt bad for him in this movie since it seemed like he didn't really fit the role. Maybe he's running out of opportunities. Jesse Eisenberg isn't my cup of tea, but he fits nicely into the fast talking role he plays, so that's cool.
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Created: 12-22-2025
This film is a confusing mess run by has-beens
Not many films confuse me as much as Killing Mary Sue. The plot is confounding. It's so terribly bad, all over the place, and all the characters are so especially unlikable that my brain is going to melt. A review on IMDb says it's a film full of has-beens and I agree. Worthless has-beens in an unfunny not-so-dark comedy.
I'd say it's woke because Sierra McCormick is a sex-starved BDSM ass kicking bitch, but who the hell cares? She could be riding a unicorn along with a dozen rainbow covered lesbians and it wouldn't make this film any worse.
This film thinks it's subtle and comedic and it's not. It really is a much lower offering then the movie Becky. It's an indie film by filmmakers telling themselves they're the wittiest folks in the room.
I cannot even explain how much I hate this film. It's so bad.
Created: 12-22-2025
An odd little forgotten gem from the 70's
Mother, Jugs & Speed is an odd black comedy from the 70's with Bill Cosby and Raquel Welch. And Larry Hagman. There's a handful of quite cringe scenes, including one where Hagman tries to have sex with an unconscious women in the back of their ambulance, and there's 70's style sexism and racism with a bit of resolution to that at the end.
I'm rating this because it's kind of a forgotten film that's held up pretty well over the years despite the 70's era not giving Raquel Welch her woman's rights and over-the-top craziness from Hagman's part. There's also more than enough darker moments to surprise the viewer. If you look just a little deeper, you get a ton of one-liners out of this one too.
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Created: 12-17-2025
Holy Hell Running Man is in-your-face
Spoiler alert. I can't give The Running Man more than half a chance. I gave up on this movie. If I missed anything good, maybe the ultra-pro commie rhetoric that other reviews speak of, let me know.
Completely unknown Alyssa Benn plays Ben's wife. She's kind of a looker, but the couple is absolutely so mixed that it's kind of not even realistic. She even kind of speaks jive.
Jesus. The first half hour, we're bombed with the aforementioned mixed race couple, a rant on the rich ("those rich people are more full of shit than me" to paraphrase), yet another black-n-white lesbian couple and, naturally, the oppressive hand of those capitalist swine leaning heavily on the backs of those little people.
I was skeptical this film could be as terrible as this. Like, I'd go in and see it's got Glen Powell who I think is cool, maybe it has some action and all of this propaganda could be discounted for that. I always think like that and I'm always wrong. This film is absolutely nothing but a vehicle for the liberal message. These commies should have dropped leaflets from a helicopter. That's how transparent all of this is. I suspect most involved have more cash than myself, so campaigning on being a commie is disingenuous anyhow.
Created: 12-16-2025
Very Unlike Melissa Joan Hart. Couldn't watch.
I admit I had a crush on Melissa Joan Hart in the very early 90's when she played Clarissa on Nickelodeon and again as Sabrina. I've kind of followed her on and off throughout the years. She just seems nice, like a good person, and that's why this film stinks. After she comes on to the Warlock apartment manager in order to stay and a few other grotesque displays, it was time for Rent Control to end.
There's no woke elements, but there's something wrong with her boyfriend. He leaves the apartment in the 2nd act for one reason or another, but they get back together. I think Melissa keeps teasing him with the prospect of sex and never gets around to it, so maybe he's just frustrated. I have to say, skip this movie.
Created: 12-12-2025
