Pha-Q woke's Reviews
Worst Marvel Movie Ever
Taika Waititi is a hack who has no understanding or respect for the characters, universe or story he is telling. Gone is the noble warrior Thor from the previous movies, Thor is a completely castrated
bumbling fool of a joke in this, actually all the male characters
are. Black Valkyrie and Woke She-Thor are super strong and perfect and amazing. This is just one big girl power movie. Black Valkyrie is now king/girl boss, Korg is now gay, Heimdall's kid is trans.
Sif who was actually a great female character in previous movies is completely sidelines and not even in this but for about 1 minute. What the hell the Zeus character was supposed to be I will never
now. So many good actors in this acting like totally morons. This was so bad I actually felt embarrassed for the actors to be doing this trash. Things just happen in this that make no sense or completely
go against established rules. How exactly is She-Thor worthy to hold Mjolnir and why does it transform her into an exact replica of real Thor? How is Thor can just seem to just spread his power around to anyone at will including turning a bunch of children into a mini Thor army complete with full power? Stormbringer was crated from the flames of a dying star and will turn anyone who not
worthy that touches in mad, but here literally anyone can just grab it even a child and nothing happens. Also very noticeable is the camera angles and what appears to be platforms for She-Thor to make her look
bigger. Natalie Portman is a very tiny 5'3 and Chris Hemsworth is 6'3 yet in every shot she appears to much closer in size to him. Even Tessa Thompson who is a slightly taller 5'4 is usually shown to be
shorter than She-Thor. This suffers from the uneven VFX a lot of modern movies do as well with the terrible and obvious green screens and sometimes great looking FX shots missed with some really terrible ones.
The only bright spot in this is the completely wasted excellent performance by Christian Bale as Gorr. His few scenes are excellent and very well done. It's actually almost like 2 different directors filmed this
movie, one competent that shot the dark serious Gorr scenes and the incompetent Waititi who shot the rest like a bad Monty Python parody of the MCU. It's just rapid fire jokes and none of it is funny!! How do you
take this dark tragic storyline and turn it into the absolute worst marvel movie ever? This might actually be the worst super hero movie ever beating out Catwoman and even Blue Beetle.
Created: 02-26-2024
So Much Potential
Based on the 1st 2 episodes only. Over the top DEI hires. This is a mix of animation and live action parody/satire on superheroes in general and seems to be DC comics in particular. The animation is very well done, but unfortunately the live action acting is terrible and the VFX are pretty bad. The comedy is all over the place, sometimes very subtle, sometimes slapstick and sometimes very in your face. I personally didn't find it all that funny but the storyline could of been great if they had maybe dropped the live action and just went with full animated series. I couldn't get past the first 2 episodes as the acting is just so bad it really ruins any chance of enjoyment.
Created: 02-21-2024
Complete Woke Garbage
This is a woke disaster. Andra and Grayskull have been race swapped from white to black. He-Man and Skeletor are
killed in episode 1 and it becomes the Teela show. From there on she seems to transition into a steroided out man
complete with bulging muscles and a male body. Everything revolves around Teela and her 'journey'. We are constantly
told she's amazing and the best ever, never mind that she's a horrible unlikable character. In season 2 Skeletor returns
for half a second and is a total simp for Evil-Lyn and is tricked into giving his power to her so she can
also transition into a muscle bulging steroid male character and become the villain. Except she's not really evil just
manipulated and tricked into it by Skeletor, because females can't be bad. The voice acting and animation
is very well done it's just such a shame that that fake fan Kevin Smith had to get his little beta
hands on it. Go watch the original or 2002 series instead.
Created: 02-21-2024
Terrible, Terrible Amateur Movie
Full disclosure I could only make it about 30 min in before giving up. The usual mixed race couple was all I really saw at that point. Everything about this is so bad I was expecting Steven Seagal to show up at any second. The acting and dialogue are terrible. The fight scenes and action are so poorly done and shot it's so obvious how slow they are moving. Find something else to watch, anything really.
Created: 02-21-2024
Strange Movie That Doesn't' Know What It Wants To Be
It's not really that woke but there is a gay prostitute and the daughter's boyfriend is a total beta. This is such a strange movie. The acting is great but the blend of silly stupid humor and serious dark revenge action movie just don't really work together. There is also some plot holes where the progression of events don't really make sense. Something will happen and you will be left wondering if you missed something or how the hell that happened. This could of been better but it's still not the worst.
Created: 02-18-2024
Worst Comic Book Movie Ever
This is just complete trash. As soon as super racist George Lopez comes on screen you know what your in for. Police bad and corrupt, white people bad and racist, corporations bad and racist, rich people bad, poor people good, illegal immigrants good and virtuous. It is spewed out like post taco bell excrement at every second. Everything about this production oozes incompetence from the director. This is another unproven DEI director that has done nothing to deserve making a 100 million dollar movie except check the right boxes. The acting and dialogue is terrible all around. The music, cinematography, and choreography all reek of ineptitude. The CG looks cheap and doesn't blend in right. The comedy and slapstick are nonstop and terrible and the jokes aren't funny they are just eyerolling bad. You would be better off watching 2004 Catwoman, at least that wasn't woke racist trash.
Created: 02-18-2024
Great Prequel With Just a Bit of Woke
There are a lot of black characters here for the time period. Yes I know this a fictional location in a fantasy setting. Doesn't' matter over representation is still present in the casting of obvious DEI. There are two instances where the poor black child says 'greed always beats need' obvious anti capitalism and rich bad poor good line. It's only said twice and its a small thing but must be noted. The black child is turned over at birth and hidden away at slave labor yet she somehow knows how to read and has to teach Wonka who doesn't know. Why? It's a stupid small thing but again it's there. Despite these things this is a great movie. The story is well thought out and executed. The FX and acting are great. The songs are funny and well done. There is a hint of woke there and should be recognized rather or not it happens to still be a great movie.
Created: 02-18-2024
Old School Non Woke Action Movie
No woke that I noticed. Great action scenes, very good acting all around. This feels like a visceral brutal action movie from the 90's. Very fast paced and entertaining.
Created: 02-18-2024
Not As Good As The First One But Still Entertaining
So woke is a way over the top DEI casting in the main characters as well as the background characters. You wont see many white people in this. One of the kids announcing he's gay and all of them saying they know and don't care is completely pointless and only there for one reason. The movie itself is pretty well done. The acting is generally pretty good and the VFX are better than most modern superheroes movies right now. It does get a little cheesy and cringe with some of the dialogue in parts but not enough that it ruined the movie. If you enjoyed the first one I would say this is worth a watch.
Created: 02-17-2024
Horrible Family Doing Stupid Things
Nothing really woke though there are a couple negative comments about capitalism and logging. The story isn't really original but the writing is horrible. The FX are actually pretty good and the creatures look good. The acting ranges from average to terrible but the real problem is the writing. So there is an island with dangerous elves who are kept behind an electric fence and the islanders keep them fed with cows and keep them a secret from the rest of the world. Why are they renting out houses to tourists? Why is a main road right by the fenced off compound? Why are they actually living there at all? Just leave. There is nothing keeping them there. Why is there no plan for if they get out and for defending themselves? There is literally one gun on the entire island (and yes you can have hunting rifles in Denmark). The biggest issue however is the absolutely horrible family of outsiders. They are truly awful people, especially the stupid annoying daughter. Never have I wanted to see a character die horribly so bad. Everything that happens to the islanders and everyone killed is a direct result of these entitled moronic douchebag people.
Created: 02-14-2024
